Luyha is the second largest community in Kenya, following the Kikuyu’s closely. This tribe also consists of 18 sub-tribes which share customs, traditions and other beliefs with minimal differences. Luyha community is one of the tribes that hold their traditions dearly, especially circumcision and marriage customs.
Procedure 1
- Traditionally courtship in Luyha community is a community affair involving parents, close relatives and friends who would directly take part in finding a suitor for their kin.
- Before the dowry negotiations there was courtship first that took place.
- The boy who plans to marry would ask his family to identify a suitable girl for him, especially his sisters, aunties and of course his mother.
- The aunties, sisters and the mother would identify the girl and speak to her on behalf of the boy.
- In cases where the family has identified more than one girl, the family would sit down, analyze them and eliminate to remain with one who met their exceptional choosing criteria.
- Girls with big hips and plump statures for childbearing gaps between their incisors were preferred by elders. They were deemed to be strong, healthy and productive for marriage in the long run.
- There was also another scenario where the boy was allowed to choose the girl he preferred to marry, this is without involving third parties.
Procedure 2
- After the first procedure has successfully taken place and the right girl is identified and parents from both parties have agreed
- They, parents from both families proceed to bless the union that is before dowry negotiations.
- The dowry process and procedure begins to take place.
- The two parties from both the man’s side and the girl’s side have a meeting for dowry negotiations.
- The dowry negotiations always involved cows and the elders who were experienced in negotiating for dowry payments.
- Under no circumstances was dowry ever paid in full at once
- One of the reasons was to avoid straining the family of the boy financially.
- Another reason was to keep family ties intact by deliberately leaving something to revisit every now and then.
- The last important reason was for the boy’s family to wait until they are satisfied and convinced that the married girl is a wife material and has the ability to conceive and bear children.
- The boy’s family, however, would pay something small before moving in with his wife.
Procedure 3
Code of Conduct for In-laws
- In- laws are the most respected people in the luyha community.
- When the man visits his in-laws there are ethical ways he is supposed to conduct himself
- The man must conduct himself with respect. Discipline and morality, this is still applied today
- The man is not allowed to approach older women for a handshake, he must wait for the handshake to be initiated by the older women
- The same goes for the woman, they are supposed to dress decently without exposing their bodies.
- Women must put on long dresses/skirts to appear decently dressed.
- Women are not also allowed to approach the older men for a handshake; instead they must wait for the older men to initiate the greetings.
- Men are not allowed to carry out some roles while at their in-laws
- Local brew ‘busaa’ forms an integral part of the festivity and must be availed to the elders for a sip
